Monday, December 10, 2007

Advice by Dr. Hope

Dear Dr. Hope,
I had been with my boyfriend for almost four years when my parents forced us to break up (I was only 15 at the time they found out). We have been apart for little over a year now but we have been talking a lot again and I love it.
The problem is that while we were apart he happened to find another girl and they became very close and he got her pregnant.
He has told her he doesn´t want to stay with her after the baby comes. He wants to pay child support and have joint custody. I am willing to be with him, despite the child, because I love him so much. The problem is that my parents would rather see me dead than with him.
Please help me. Your advice would be greatly appreciated.

Carol Smith

Dear Carol Smith,

I understand all the worries this problem caused on you because it's a delicate situation wich deserves very care.

You have to talk with your boyfriend and see if you really want to be together besides all the adversities, because it's very serious to stay with a person who already has a son, and understand that is a huge responsability, to raise a son who isn't yours. After that comes the most difficult part: the talk with your parents.

Your boyfriend and you have to show all the reasons why you should be together and tell them you're in love and no one should try to separate you. You also have to explain the situation of his son and all the hard work you will do to give the basics need to the child. You have to convince them you will only be happy together and nobody can change that.

However, there is the possibility that your parents don't accept your love and the sacrificies you are capable to do. In this case, you will have to decide if you want to be loyal to your parents or to your boyfriend. This choice only depends on you and I can do nothing to help you here, it's your decision, I know it's hard but this is the only way.

I hope my advice will help you and I'm sure you will take the best decision for your happiness.


Filipa Pinto
10º C

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